Teens and Dating - What Exactly Does "Hanging Out" Mean Anyway?

When approaching my husband and I about dating one of the questions we were asked was "Could we hang out".  And then again my son would ask, "mom can we hang out?  she just wants to hang out". 

So, being the clever mom I am I asked him "What exactly does hanging out mean anyway?"

My sons response, "I don't know". 

If you do not know what hanging out means or what you will be doing while hanging out then why in the world do you think we would allow you to do it? 

Hanging out could mean: 

sitting on the couch watching tv

taking a walk

playing a video game

going to the movies
spending time with friends or family

Or it could mean the following possibly combined with any of the above possibilities:

sitting on couch alone together

holding hands

hugging

cuddling

kissing

inappropriate touching

I DON'T EVEN WANT TO THINK ABOUT WHAT ELSE IT COULD MEAN!

I am a mom but what our children forget is that we were once teenagers too.  The same wants, desires and temptations existed then and I see from the end looking backwards where I went wrong.  I see decisions that I made that were not good in any way, not honoring of my parents and definitely not Glorifying to God.  I know what can happen when innocent "hanging out" is the plan.  I am sure that many of you do too.

It is our job as parents to protect our children.  To keep them from harm.  To help them not make the same bad decisions and mistakes that some of us made before them.  Hormones are running wild in teenagers - so wild they are unable to think straight and make good decisions.  It is my job as a mom to help them make good choices.

Please don't take me wrong, it is not that I don't trust my children.  I believe my son when he says he wouldn't do anything he shouldn't BUT I am not so naive to think that things can't just happen.  I believe what he says (he believes it too), but having never been in a situation he doesn't know or fully understand what he is telling me he won't do. 

Do you allow your teens to just "hang out" with their boyfriend or girlfriend?

Read more posts about Teens and Dating by clicking below.

Teens and Dating - Throw Away Relationship
Teens and Dating - Group Dating Verses Double Dating
Teens and Dating - When is it ok?

Potato & Kielbasa Bake

 

This weeks recipe is one that can be used for breakfast, lunch or dinner.  It is simple to make and tastes yummy.  And best of all it's only 4 ingredients.

 

Potatoes

Green onions

Kielbasa Sausage

Cheddar Cheese

 

Peel and chop your potatoes for frying and add them to a skillet with oil.  Next chop and add onions and sausage.  Fry until potatoes are done.  I usually drain mine on a paper towel at this point to attempt to get rid of some of the oil. 

 

 

Then you simply put your potato mixture in a baking pan and cover it with cheddar cheese.  Pop it in the oven on 350 degrees until the cheese is melted and Serve.

 

 

 

 

Teens and Dating - The Throw Away Relationship

Why do parents think it is ok for their teenagers to have multiple relationships filled with fighting, heartache, pain and breakups?

I know that some people who date as teenagers do stay together and get married and lead long, healthy and prosperous lives BUT in a country where the Divorce rate even among Christian couples is over 50 % the chances of this happening are frankly slim to none. 

I was a teen that dated in high school.  I dated one guy primarily for most of my high school career.  Did I suffer through countless fights, heartaches, pains and breakups?  YES, yes I did.  Am I married to that person today?  No, no I am not.  Thank You JESUS!

It is socially acceptable today to date many people and when you are tired of them or disagree with them to just break up and throw that relationship away.  This teaches our children and teens that when times get tough or situations that are hard arise it's ok to walk away.  It's ok to leave.  It's ok to move on to someone else.  Someone prettier, healthier, wealthier, smarter,....

It sets their hearts up for a throw away relationship later in life.  I am not suggesting that all teens who date many people then get married will end up in divorce by no means.  I am one of those teens and I am happily married to my best friend.  The man God placed in my life.  He is stuck with me for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, in skinniness and fatness, with beautiful hair and hair that's turning grey. 

But it does send the message that when you don't get along it's ok to move on.  Why not just wait and PRAY.  Pray for God to send you the right person when it's time and COMMIT to staying pure in mind, heart, body and spirit until that person presents his/herself to you.

Why not teach our children to pray for their future spouses?  To pray that they also stay pure in mind, heart, body and spirit until the time when God puts them together so that neither of them carry the hurt, pain and baggage from previous relationships into the new one.

Do you pray for your childrens future spouse?  I have to admit this used to be a concept I thought was crazy because who's thinking about your children getting married when they are babies or toddlers or better yet when they are in your womb?  God is.  He has all of their days planned out already.  If He thinks it's important we probably should too.

Psalm 139:13  For you created my inmost being;  you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

Jerimiah 1:5  Before I formed you in the womb I knew^[a] you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

More on Teens and Dating:
Group Dating Verses Double Dating
When is it ok?

Teens and Dating - Group Dating Verses Double Dating

What's the difference anyway?

I recently did a post on Teens and Dating - When is it ok?  If you read that post you will know that we do not think young teens are emotionally, physically, spiritually or mentally mature enough to go out on dates.   

When my son figured out (for the moment because I am sure he will ask us more in the future) but when he figured out that we were not giving in to him "hanging out" or going on a date to the movies with his "girl friend" he began asking about group dating.  Group dating because his dad and I have told him when he is a little older that we would be ok with him going on a "group date".  I explained to him that we did not mean he could group date right now - again he is only 14 - but that in the future before he is allowed to really date we would consider "group dating" with some close friends.  He continued on in his asking and I began to see what it was that he thought, assumed, hoped group dating was. 

To my son and probably many other young teens out there to go on a group date meant him, his girlfriend and another couple they were friends with.  Huh? No, No, NO, NO!  That is a DOUBLE DATE I told him.  A double date is when a group of 4 friends who happen to be 2 sets of couples go out on a date. 

A Group Date is when a group of friends, emotionally unattached to each other except in friendship go somewhere together and spend time as friends having fun.  A group of friends that love each other as if they were brothers and sisters.

Moms, help me out here - Do you see a difference in a double date and a group date?  Do you allow your children to Group Date?  If so, what age did you start allowing this?

Homemade Chocolate Frosty

A while back I came across this awesome blog called Trains and Tutus  and when looking through their recipes I found one for 3 ingredient Homemade Chocolate Ice Cream. 

I love easy recipes and my family loves to make Homemade Ice cream when it's warm so we decided to give this a try.  To our surprise what was supposed to taste like Chocolate Ice Cream tasted very much like a Wendy's Chocolate Frosty.  Yummy! 

I asked the blog owner if I could share her recipe with my readers and she has graciously allowed me to. 

 Original Recipe

1 - 8 ounce container of cool whip

1 can sweetened condensed milk

chocolate milk - approx. 1/2 gallon

 

(We added in 3 generous squirts of chocolate syrup the second time we made it to give it a little more chocolate goodness.)  

 

Mix all of the above ingredients together and add into your ice cream maker and follow the instructions that come with it for the proper salt/ice mixture.

 
Next time we are going to try making a vanilla version of this because my youngest son prefers it over the chocolate.  I will share our vanilla recipe with you soon.

A Submitted Wife

What does it mean to be a submitted wife? 

Does it mean that I am perfect?  Does it mean that I am a door mat for my husband?  Does it mean that my opinion in this thing called marriage doesn't matter?  Does it mean that my husband is more important to God in our marriage than me?  Does it mean that I never get a say in what goes on?  Is being submitted something I am made to do?

The answer to all of these questions is NO!

When my husband and I were dating and first married I was very independent (nearing the line of feminism).  I loved him but I had my own way, I didn't need help and I had an "I can do it just as well as he can" mentality.  In part I was this way because up until he and I started going out I had to be or at least I felt like I had to be but another part of me wanted to be this way.  I wanted this freedom of not having to be dependent upon anyone else. 

God never intended for us to be totally independent, not in need of help from Him or from others.  And he definitely never intended us to independent from our spouse.  God created Adam and said that it was not good for him to be alone so he created Eve - a help meet for him.  Did you notice that?  Not good for him to be alone. 

In Ephesians the Bible says that the husband is to leave his mother and father, likewise the wife also is to leave her father and mother and the two (husband and wife) shall become one.  Is it possible for us to literally become one?  Of course not.  But in God's eyes when we join ourselves in the marriage covenant with our spouse we do become as one flesh existing as two individual beings.

Now, how many of you know that just because you get married does not mean that you and your husband think alike all of the time?  Just because you are married it doesn't mean that you both all of the sudden agree on every decision that comes your way.

This my sweet friend is where submission comes into the picture.  Submission is something that a wife freely gives to her husband.  It is not something that a husband can demand or take from his wife.  Submission is an attitude of the heart that a woman chooses to give her husband.  Submission according to the Amplified version of the Bible is simply adapting yourself to your husband.

I submit to my husband because I love him, I trust him, I respect him and because God tells me to.  As wives we need to put our trust in God, step out in faith and submit to our husbands. 

Are you a Submissive Wife?

Teens and Dating - When is it ok?

When is it ok for Teens to Date?

Here are some of my thoughts.

Did you know that I can not find one place in the Bible that talks about dating without the intent to get married.  Recreational dating obviously is something that we have created in the last however many years.  I research my genealogy as a hobby and I really don't think that my ancestors from the 1700 and 1800's dated for fun.  They dated (very briefly) then got married.  They didn't date one person and move on to someone else - They dated with a purpose.  They dated, got married and started a family.  Women were homemakers and the men were farmers (at least in my family).

I am writing this post because we are in this stage of parenting right now with my oldest who will soon be 15 years old.  He, over the past couple of months has "gotten a girlfriend".  I use those words very lightly because he only sees her at school.  We do not allow him to date.  Over the past couple of months they have "broken up" and now have gotten back together.   My husband and I have told him he can't date until he is at least 16 and even then we will have to discuss it. 

Here are some reasons why teens should not date:

* Should be focusing on building their relationship with God.
* School is too important - Grades will suffer when your focus is elsewhere. 
* Not mature enough to make wise decisions.
* Teens do not know or understand what love is.
* I don't even want to talk about hormones. 
* No money for the date.  Am I supposed to pay for it?  I don't think so.
* Dating brings on emotions and feelings that teens are not equipped to handle.

I find more and more that parents are promoting this.  Many parents think sending their young teens off on dates is perfectly acceptable.  After all, teen will be teens.

NOT MY TEEN!  Not if I can possibly help it.  My children are set apart.  They are different.  They are here for a purpose.  God has a plan for each one of them.  I am supposed to be a good Steward over these children God has placed in my care. 

I know that some of you will think we are mean or silly but I believe with everything in me that teens should be having fun and enjoying their friends in high school.  They should be focused on other things that will actually make a difference in their future.  There is plenty of time to date and settle down.  I do one day want my children to get married - that's sort of what my job is for - preparing them for real life but I am in no hurry and they shouldn't be either. 

How about you?  Do you have or have you had teenagers?  How did you deal with the dating thing?

To Read More On Teens and Dating You can check out my post titled Teens and Dating - Group vs. Double Date

Freezing Homemade Biscuits

A while back I posted my recipe and a step by step tutorial of how to make Homemade Biscuits.  There are several reasons why I like to make my own.  It saves money.  They taste better.  I know what ingredients are used. 

Here is an easy way to freeze your own homemade biscuits. 

First, after you have cut your biscuits out place them on a cookie sheet (not touching) and place the cookie sheet in the freezer.  I usually leave mine about 30 minutes or so until they are frozen pretty good. 

Take them out of the freezer and stack them up.  Because you have flash frozen them already they won't stick together and later when you want to bake them they will pull apart easy.

I usually stack 8 - 10 and you can wrap them in saran wrap or wax paper for an extra layer of protection if you would like.  I do sometimes do this especially if I am hoping to keep them for a while. 

Simply place them in your freezer bag, squeeze out all of the air and label them if you like.

When it is time to bake your frozen biscuits I find it best to take them from the freezer, pull them apart and place them on your baking sheet and allow them to sit and thaw for about 30 minutes before placing them in the oven.  This helps them to puff up and raise like they would if they were fresh. 

I bake my Frozen biscuits on about 375 for 18 minutes or until golden brown on top.  If you are trying this for the first time I would recommend that you set your timer for about 12 minutes and check them adding additional time if needed.  Ovens all bake differently and yours may take more or less time than mine. 

Have you ever frozen biscuits?  Are you planning to give this a try?

Clean Hairspray Residue From Bathroom Surfaces

I know I am probably not the only person in the world that this happens to.  Hairspray build up on the flat surfaces in my bathroom.  On my sink and floor mostly.  Even with regular cleaning and daily wiping of the sink over time the hairspray, because it dries quickly builds up.  Lately I was noticing that my sink top was a little rough feeling and didn't have the shine to it that it once did.  Regular cleaners were not removing it. 

 

So, how did I fix it?  Rubbing Alcohol. 

I took a cotton ball and saturated it with rubbing alcohol and then rubbed it all over my sink top.  It took away all the hairspray residue and left it smooth and shiny again. 

 

It worked like a charm and was quick and cheap.

 

 

Do you ever have to clean hairspray residue from your bathroom surfaces or am I the only one?

National Day of Prayer 2013

What exactly is National Day of Prayer?

The National Day of Prayer is a special day set aside in our country where people gather together at churches, schools, courthouses, etc... and publicly pray. Our Country was founded by primarily Christian men and it was and has always been a Nation that is blessed by God. We are a Christian Nation, founded on a belief in THE ONE TRUE GOD. We are blessed to be able to call on the Name of Jesus in a Public Place without fear of retribution.

National Day of Prayer was established by Congress in 1952 and signed into Law by President Harry Truman but The Continental Congress had called for such a day going all the way back to 1775.  In 1988 President Ronald Reagan amended the law to make the National Day of Prayer the first Thursday in May.

The Honorable the Congress having recommended it to the United States to set apart Thursday the 6th of May next to be observed as a day of fasting, humiliation and prayer, to acknowledge the gracious interpositions of Providence; to deprecate [to pray or intreat that a present evil may be removed] deserved punishment for our Sins and Ingratitiude, to unitedly implore the Protection of Heaven; Success to our Arms and the Arms of our Ally: The Commander in Chief enjoins a religious observance of said day and directs the Chaplains to prepare discourses proper for the occasion; strictly forbidding all recreations and unnecessary labor.” —George Washington, First President of the United States[10][11] (Quote taken from Wikpedia)  

The National Day of Prayer task forces mission statement is this:

The mission of the National Day of Prayer Task Force is to mobilize prayer in America and to encourage personal repentance and righteousness in the culture.

This morning I drove my youngest son to school so that I could attend The National Day of Prayer event being held there.  What an honor and a privilege to be able to do such a thing.  I remind my kids often how blessed they are to be able to attend things like this or their Bible Clubs and Prayer Groups.  Not even in America are all schools ok with it.  We are blessed.

I urge you today to take time out to pray.  It doesn't matter if you live in the United States or not.  It also doesn't matter if you are able to attend a public event (although it will bless your heart if you can).  What does matter is that we take some time today and every day to talk with our Heavenly Father.  Take time to call upon the Name of Jesus and pray for our elected leaders, our military, our schools, communities and our children.

Do you attend any Public National Day of Prayer Events?

Destroying an Inheritance of Family Bondage

Chapter 22

In the book Stormie says that we all know we get our hair and eye color from our parents or grandparents but did you know that we also pickup character qualities too?

When some people think of family bondage they think of alcohol, drugs and depression.  Things that are life threatening and life altering for the family for many generations but did you know that things such as lying, unforgiveness, perfectionism and a bad temper can also be an inherited trait?

As an adult I see many character qualities in my parents that I do not wish to mimic. But we also need to look at our own lives and consider our character qualities and think is this something we would rather our own children not inherit.

For example: 

Do you have a tendency to stretch the truth?

Do you cuss?

Do you smoke or chew tobacco?

Do you tell dirty jokes?

Do you have hatred for someone in your heart?

Are you happy or do you exhibit anger?

Are you selfish, always thinking of yourself?

People will look at this list and think "well saying a little cuss word every now and then doesn't hurt"  but those same people would punish their children for saying the "little" cuss word.

 

And I am not saying that chewing tobacco or smoking is a sin and will send you to hell but I am saying if you chew tobacco then there is a much greater chance that your children will also.  We should not want our children to be bound in any way.  Not bound to smoking or drinking or lying or being selfish, etc...

Seriously think about your behavior and character traits and if they are something you want your children to inherit from you.  I want to leave a good inheritance to my children. 

Proverbs 13:22 says  A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children,  but a sinner’s wealth is stored up for the righteous.

Humming Bird Nectar

I just had to share my picture.  This is one of my first Hummers this year. 

To make your own Humming Bird "Nectar" you will need 2 ingredients.

Sugar and Water.

1 part sugar to 4 parts water. 

 Mix it together in a pot and boil it for 2 minutes.

Allow your nectar to cool and then add it to your feeder. There isn't a need to add red food coloring (although I usually add a drop or two just because I think it's pretty). The Hummers will come eat even with the nectar is clear.

Dollar Tree Drawer Organizing

A desperate need to clean out and organize my drawers and cabinets combined with a quick trip to the local Dollar Tree resulted in some great looking drawers.  I am still in the process of getting them all organized but wanted to quickly show you a few so that you can see what you can accomplish by only spending a few dollars and a small amount of time cleaning. 

Here is a look at some of my Dollar Tree baskets and containers.

The possibilities are endless as to what you could use these small containers and baskets for.  I especially like them because they are the perfect height to fit in both our kitchen and bathroom drawers. 

First up - one of my kitchen utensil gadget drawers.  Previously everything was just thrown in there and you could barely even get it shut but now everything has a home. 

Now on to the bathroom.  My husbands drawer.

And then my makeup drawer.  I added 4 small containers to my drawer.  The red one holds foundation, compact powder, blush and bronzers.  The blue one houses all of my eyeliners, mascara, tweezers, tweezing mirror and lash curler.  The green one in the back holds eye shadows.  The long skinny green basket is the perfect size to hold all of my makeup brushes.  I have lipsticks, lip gloss and lip liners in the little black zipper pouch in the front (no more room for a container) and my loose powder and bronzers just sitting there in the front.

I am so excited (yes I am that big of a nerd) to be getting everything decluttered and organized in my home.  When all of your stuff has a home to live in it makes life much more enjoyable and peaceful!

Do you ever shop at Dollar Tree for containers to organize with?  If so, please share. 

Pasta Salad - Super Quick, Easy and Tasty

My brain is thinking on summer.  Warm weather, cookouts, lazy days at the pool, grilling out and spending time with family.  aaaahhhhh

With that in mind here is a Pasta Salad recipe that is super quick and super easy and everyone always loves.  It's great for your summer time picnic or cookout and only has 4 ingredients!

1 box rainbow rotini
1 regular bottle Italian dressing
1 large cucumber
1 large tomato

Cook your pasta according to package directions.  Drain and Rinse.
Peel and cube your cucumber.
Cube your tomato
Add Italian dressing and mix all together.
Chill until ready to serve.

YUMMY!

**This pasta salad tastes terrific just as it is but sometimes I like to change it up a bit and will add any or all of the following:  McCormick Salad Sensations - sprinkled on it and mixed up, or I have added black olives to add a little more color and some pepperoni chopped up in it adds a little different taste as well.  

A Heart For My Home

Where is your heart? 

Where is your treasure?

Matthew 6:21 says For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Before I go further in the is post - let me say that my Number 1 Treasure is found in God and The relationship (not religion) that I have with him. 

This blog is titled A Heart For My Home because truly that is where my heart is.  My Heart is at Home and my Treasure also is at home. 

No, My treasure isn't found in the stick built house we call home.  My treasure is not the little trinkets or decorations that adorn the tables and walls inside my house and it's not in the food that is prepared here on a daily basis. 

My Treasure at Home is My Family. The Family that God has so richly Blessed Me With.  My Husband - a godly man, the Leader of our Home,  my best friend.   My Sons - that I am a steward over for the Lord - the ones I am working on building and shaping into Mighty Men of God that are Gonna Shake Future Generations for Jesus.  

In today's world so many people treasure the wrong things.  The big house they live in, the newest car to drive, name brand clothes, flat screen tv's in every room and all the cool gadgets of the day.  Don't get me wrong here - there is nothing wrong with having all of these things, God wants us blessed so we can be a blessing to others but what God doesn't want is for our treasure to be in earthly good's. 

3 John 1:2  Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in every way and [that your body] may keep well, even as [I know] your soul keeps well and prospers.

Matthew 6:19-21  ¹⁹ “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. ²⁰ But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹ For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

I encourage you to examine your heart today and really think about what you treasure.  Do you enjoy taking care of your family?  Do you love the mundane tasks of cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, running errands, etc... 

In Titus 2, Woman are called to love their husbands and children and be keepers at home among other things.

My job is at home.  My heart is at home.  My treasure is at home.

Titus 2:4-5 ⁴ Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵ to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

Where is your Heart?